Chayei Sarah - Thanks Mom & Dad!

 

Chayei Sarah -  Thanks Mom & Dad!

This week's Torah portion is dedicated in Honor of my parents and the example they set;

Dear Mom & Dad,

Thanks for the road map and example!

                    

In this week's Torah reading, we read about Abraham and Sarah and their wonderful, amazing  marriage, their true loving relationship, even after Sarah's passing.  She understood things that he did not, and he did things she was unable.  A true partnership, and of true meaning!  They had the value of understanding, balance, tolerance, and honest acceptance of the gifts the other had from within.  This is a true healthy blueprint for any and all relationships .

In the beginning of this Parsha (Torah Portion), Abraham is purchasing the place for Sarah to be buried, and not only for his beloved Sarah, but a plot big enough for her, and eventually the entire family.  He wanted to be buried next to his wife; the same woman who shared his world!

His love and his respect for her is/was  'chessed shel emes'

, A true and loving kindness.

His purchasing the cave of the Machpelech, really declared that she was his partner, and he lived in the era of Sarah!  She made and had a positive, loving impact on him. 

We should all learn and apply the lesson and story about Abraham and Sarah.  We live in such a fast moving, instant gratification, I want it now, and disposable world  and we are very quick to jump in and out and judge without looking at the ENTIRE picture and happenings, and .............not put the valuable time and or effort into solid relationships/friendship at times. We honestly must breathe, take a moment, and chill, then 'strategize' about our relationship.  How do "we' drive this; map it out and expect a change and adjustment here and there!

My folks are a prime example!  They happily just celebrated their 65th Wedding Anniversary!   When my parents we’re in the beginning of their relationship of courting,  they showed and practiced true tolerance and BOTH knew not every day is or would be perfect….and with the good, comes the not so good days, and sometimes, hard times with in their relationship just might approach and make a presence. They would 'bend', like that of Sarah and Abraham, and 'worked' through the issues and build up, and CONSTRUCTED, and not tear apart so rapidly like the more modern generations that are present today, or some and not all; they watched the criticism, and relied more on CONSTRUCTION & BUILDING UP!! 

I have a love for Legos dating back to when Ken, my OLDER brother introduced them to me, and then my own son, Nate had a passion to construct and build upon with the plastic bricks!!!  In my home, we have 3 clear, see through Rubbermaid huge boxes of Lego pieces!!   SShh, I'll let you in on a secret, sometimes, I take a time out & build something UP and such a feeling of satisfaction!  You can look at Legos with locking mechanisms to build, and not slippery blocks that fall with just a light touch!  It is too easy to dispose and not follow the BLUE PRINT.  Again, my parents just celebrated 65 years of marriage this past October and used this practice, philosophy, manner. 

A little bit about them-  And please allow me to boast and even boast more; it's rather easy with such fine parents who are and set a great example; they both are one another's best friend, love & respect each other, and it's a loving relationship, even when the not so easy times happened.  It is their communication with one another!   They did not crumble, fall out of favor with another, or act like their marriage was a used napkin and tossed it aside when they were thrown a curveball, or a text (they did not have social media and texting, thankfully!!)  that might be misinterpreted???  They communicated correctly and with a passion and compassion of understanding!  When my dad was temporarily out of work (for no fault of his), or my mom decided it was time for her to go back to work part time and give back to society, they truly 100% supported one another and "TALKED" things throughs!   (The picture I have attached of my parent's with family friends , or as I say, "generational friends, Pearl & Mel, who celebrated 65 years of marriage a few months before my parents, and also understand and absolutley show the world what it  takes to really make it with compassion and REAL communication!!!!! )     

Now, we see a text, or an email, or a POST declaring, "It's over" that we misinterpret, and say, "NO MORE!!!"  Has society not failed us? Has technology, or the easy access and usage might owed us to not make it work and make an effort, a true and honest effort??? Some sincere food for thought!

 I choose my parent's path, and CONSTRUCT, BUILD UPON, ACCEPT CHANGE and IDEAS, and BE OPEN TO DISCUSSION, or I at least try......!  I like that generation's road map and blueprint, mostly! Obviously, times change, but our values, compassion and tolerance should not!  We must cultivate our relationships/friendships, like we do with so many other facets of our lives, but we must invest in ourselves and our loved/liked ones.  Yes, do issues arise?  Of course, but if a relationship is that disposable to just toss aside or press delete or BLOCK, or now "SNOOZE" (go way for a period of time), was it worth time initial investment? WWASD or WWTDD?  What would Abraham and Sarah do/What would Trude & Don do?  

Concrete blocks need to be built into a solid foundation, or like Lego's together for any solid and worthwhile relationship.   Is it always easy?  NO, of course not, but a real solid relationship is worth having a solid plan, and understanding “What if’s, and a loving hand!  Just an FYI, my parents were literally kids when they wed; my mom a few months shy of 18 (Huge difference f maturity back then) and my dad in his early 20's! Hey, my own kids are that age!!!!  They just got it, and  really did the work TOGETHER, and have had such Naches!

                                                            A STORY:

There was a very young man who was dating a nice girl for a VERY short period of time, and went to his parents and exclaimed with conviction, "I love her, I love her, I love her.....and she loves ME!"  His parents paused and said, "build a solid foundation and get to know and understand one another, and make a plan of action together."    He resisted, and they got married the next day!  A few months’ pass, and he literally cried and again said with such conviction, "I must divorce her; she uses four words!"  His parents asked with amazement, "please share!?"

"Mama, and Dad, she told me to COOK, WORK, WASH, and HELP!"

Okay, maybe a little laugh, maybe not!   Be it a marriage, a friendship, a love interest, or any healthy relationship takes understanding , patience, and 'chessed shel emes' (A True and Loving Kindness).

Thanks Mom & Dad